A devout Muslim man with six sons all named Muhammad travels from London to Syria to join ISIS and after 18 months they are all killed in a US bombing raid on their compound.
Their souls arrive at the gate to heaven being met by an older looking man dressed in robes.
"Are you prophet Muhammad" asked the father – Muhammad.
"No I’m Saint Peter".
"Saint Peter but where is the prophet where is Allah"?
Saint Peter then opens the gate and points to the most beautiful being glowing in eternal radiance.
"Oh almightily Allah", exclaimed Muhammad, "I have been your loyal servant all my life. As a young boy, I memorized your entire holy book until I was able to recite it every word and ensured that all my sons could do the same."
"I obeyed every word of your holy book and the Hadith of your great prophet Muhammad. Me and my sons have devoted all our lives to your service oh almightily Allah.
We abandoned our life of luxury in Britain and travelled to Syria to join your great jihad against the infidels. We raped Christian and Yazidi girls and took many as our sex slaves as per your almightily words dictated to the prophet 4:24. We had orgies and ripped their holes open. We burned convents and monasteries to the ground. We dragged out the old nuns and beheaded them and raped the younger ones making them our sex slaves. We beheaded monks and priests. We took their gold, sold it and donated the funds to your great service.
My sons were trained as engineers and built car bombs that were driven into infidels blowing up hundreds. We lined up our infidel enemies placed them into cages and burnt them alive. My son – Muhammad the doctor used his medical scalpel to remove the skin from the infidel flesh skinning alive these filthy infidels then leaving them to suffer pain from burying them in ant hills to be eaten.
We even had a boiling water shower whereby we purified these filthy infidels by pouring scalding water over them.
We took an iron rod heated until red hot and stuck it up their filthy anus to purify their rat holes.
We drove burning irons into their eyes and then their ears and then their mouths to shut them up.
We disemboweled and pulled out the infidels dirty insides and let the vultures feast on them while they were still living.
We took a chain saw and chopped up this filth starting with their legs and then their arms and left them to bleed out slowly dying in a cesspool of blood.
Hundreds of infidels are now in hell thanks to me and my beloved sons who have devoted their lives to your service oh almightily Allah.
Where is the prophet oh great one? I have dreamed since I was 6 of meeting him".
"I’m the lord thy God and not your evil allah. I gave you and your sons and all Homo Sapiens the greatest gift in the universe your brain and conscience to do good and not evil, to live in freedom and not tyranny to treat all human beings of all races as equals, women the equal of men.
How could you bastardize my name by following such an evil book as the Quran – the creation of a very evil man – Muhammad. Every word of that horrific evil book is from Muhammad. He used his brain to do evil.
Raping women is the very epitome of evil.
Murdering is the very epitome of evil.
Islam is the greatest crime and sin ever committed against Me.
To kill and rape, to commit acts of evil in My name is evil."
"Behold your prophet" and with a sweep of his hand, God showed a figure cowering in the darkness in pain and agony not of the body but of the mind.
"This is your evil prophet. He is not in hell burning in eternal fire because there is no hell. He is in eternal damnation and his soul is feeling all the pain that he has inflicted on others, all the pain they have suffered is washing over his soul every day forever and ever and ever. And behind him are the billions of Muslim men who believed in his evil allah because the goodness would have told them that this evil Muhammad was no prophet.
And now be gone from my sight all you Muhammads. You will never come into my presence again."
Muhammad and his 6 sons started to wail in pure torrent as the pain of all the girls and women they raped, all the women and men they murdered, all the pain they had inflicted on their wives, washed over their souls feeling what they felt forever and ever.
No virgin paradise just the darkness of eternal damnation.
All their wives ascended into Heaven.